Welcome Jaden Marcus

Jaden Marcus Lau
June 27, 2008 at 4:26 p.m. 7lbs. 8 oz., 19.5"

Some notable quotables from the proud new papa:

"I'm in the 'hood' now.......'FATHERHOOD'"

"This whole child birthing thing gives me a whole new respect for women"

"Breastfeeding is a beautiful thing!"

"His nuts are HUGE!!!!!"


More photos on Jim's Facebook page.
Congratulations to Jim, Jeanie and Jaden!


Related Links:
Mr. and Mrs. Jimmy Lau
The Wedding Banquet
Jim, You Lucky Dawg

Progress is made

As promised, here is the final printed cover of our Progress Report. Looks familiar, doesn't it? You're thinking, "Didn't Captain Insano hate it?" Yep, she sure did. So what happened?

When I last left off, I was tied in this 3-legged race with a fellow return-from-the-dead designer and we were going nowhere. After a few fruitless collaborations, we decided to just separate and work on our own. Good thing.

Without being tainted by my superior design experience individual style, the other designer instantly created a cover the Captain truly loved. It was a montage of people, families, children, all smiling and enjoying life in the great outdoors. I found it strange that the Captain would gravitate toward this cover since it was not a lifestyle she exemplifies. But it seemed to have created a soft spot in her rigid demeanor. My guess is that the cover is like the Mirror of Erised from Harry Potter.

In the Mirror of Erised ("desire" spelled backwards), people will see whatever their hearts desire to see. In Harry's case, he longed to see his parents so he would spend hours in front of it dreaming of how life could have been. In the Captain's case, in that cover she saw a reflection of what she yearned for... an exuberant life with loving family and cheerful friends joyously romping outdoors under the bright sun. She saw herself being sociable and warmhearted and gentle – a total reverse from the horrible creature she has become. In that cover, she found a life she had long forgotten. In that cover, she found her own personal Mirror of Erised.

Wiping away her acid tears of sentimental bliss, she took off in her warcraft to visit Godfather Merciless, destined to sell this cover to him. Moments later, the walls shook and my shackles began to rattle again, as loose pebbles rained upon the scattering mice in my cell. Yep, you guessed it. The Godfather hated it! "What is this?! How dare we distort our clientele!! No happy family would ever ride our transit system!! Where's the homeless people and the teenage moms??!!" He warns the Captain that this is now two strikes. A third strike would result in complete annihilation!

The Captain returned dumbfounded and speechless. We feared who she would drag out back next. But she was too crushed and hurt... unable to raise her eyebrow and flare her nostrils to summon her python. For a moment, we felt kinda sorry for her as she sluggishly retreated to her cave. Sometimes when I walk past her cavernous den, I hear her soft sorrowful moans echo throughout the darkness. Something has changed.

So now what? The year is almost half over and we still don't have a cover design. Both the Sarge and Major were freaking out, frantically updating their resumes and stockpiling their bomb shelters. For they say, no one is safe from the wrath of the Godfather!

I live to tell of this...
The next day while I was dusting the cobwebs, I had an unexpected guest. It was the Godfather himself! He totally caught me by surprise! You see, normally I hear visitors coming way in advance because it's a long way down to the dungeon and I can hear them wheezing because the air is thin. Also sometimes they slosh or slip on the remains of the half-eaten designers. But the Godfather, unlike mortals, floats and drifts inconspicuously without warning. The only traces of him are a sudden chill on the back of your neck and a subtle stench of death.

As I tremble, trying not to look directly into his eyes, he stares and studies me but says nothing at all (I was later told he was reading my soul). He inspects my cell and evaluates my various mock-ups taped upon the concrete walls. He eyes one of my designs. I hear a sinister snicker. He snatches it and quickly floats away.


Later that evening at the assembly of the Enormously Vile Infamous Leaders (EVIL), the Godfather demands why he was not shown this design! The Sarge explains that she and the Major both loved that design, but since the Captain hated it, it never made it to his unholiness. With this revelation, the Godfather becomes enraged at the Captain and strips her of all artistic oversight. But little mattered, as the Captain, deflated and demoralized, no longer had any interest in our department. She now plans to refocus her efforts and torment another group.

So in the meantime, I was asked to do some minor tweaking, such as change out some photos and add more people to make our company seem more "human." Furthermore, I was permitted to go outside in the sun to take photos of fellow captives employees in our courtyard. Below are the individual photos I had to assemble to create the final cover.


Now that the job is finished, I am overjoyed. This was by far the most difficult project I've ever encountered – not to mention working with the absolute most difficult people too! With this project I realized the importance of my regular therapy sessions – which is known as my blog. To me, quietly typing out my frustrations is an incredible stress reliever. Sometimes, to take your job more seriously, you just need to step back and joke about it. Well, it may not work for everyone, but it works for me!

Disclaimer: All the facts presented here are not entirely accurate and some characters may be fictitcious and only exist in my imagination.

Related Link: Making Progress with the Captain

2 Free Tacos Today

Free Thomas the Tank Engine

Print out a couple. You stand in one line, your spouse in another. Go back the next day. This is the best freebie from Toys R Us to date. Those wooden Thomas trains are mega expensive. And I'm pretty sure the lead-paint scare is over with.

Click on image to download printable PDF file.

Update: I was told by one of my readers that the red coupon doesn't work. Also that they run out real fast. So it's just a scam to get people in the store with limited supply, like Black Friday.

Father's Day - Hmm, did I miss it?

Father's Day is nonexistent in our household. Since both our fathers are no longer around, no one in either family celebrates it. Unlike Mother's day, there's no family gatherings, no fancy meals, no mention of it. The only call we get is the reminder to visit the grave site.

Sunday after church we went directly to the cemetery to visit my father-in-law with my inlaws Afterwards we were invited to their house to hang out, only to hear, "We ain't got no food." at 6:00. Hey, I can take a hint! So we left. On the way home we thought about stopping at a restaurant, but one kid was asleep while another was having a meltdown. We had no choice but to rush home and eat leftovers.

Hmm, so what else did I do this Father's Day weekend? Did I get to go play tennis? No. Instead I did fatherly things like move furniture, change the oil, and install a motion light. Good thing we fellowshipped with friends at church both Saturday and Sunday, or else the weekend would've been a total crapfest.

As you can tell, life as a father can be quite miserable if you selfishly focus on all the things you "should've" had but didn't get, like steak dinner, honorable children, worshipful wife, etc. But I've learned to lower my expectations and just be content with the life I'm stuck blessed with.

All kidding aside, I love my family regardless of how often I want to wring the boys' necks. These are the challenges that make my fatherhood unique. Would I rather have someone else raise my kids or raise theirs instead? Maybe. But at the end of a horrible day, when I look into Justine's eyes, or see the boys peacefully sleeping, all my troubles seem to melt away and I'm thrilled that they are all mine. Fatherhood is all about patience, understanding, and trying harder the next day. And thanks to my patience, I finally got my steak dinner tonight :) It's great being a dad!!

35% cash back from Paypal, Ebay, and Livesearch

I just found this deal last night on Hustler Money Blog.

I'll just cut and paste:

Microsoft recently added cash back using their Live Search Engine when shopping online. They are currently running a promotion whereas you can get 35% cash back from Ebay when paying with Paypal on Buy It Now items. Here’s what to do:

1. First you need to get a MSN Live account. You will also need an Ebay and Paypal account.
2. Now, do a Live Search and type in “Cheap Wii” or "Cheap PS2"
   
3. You should see this “Wii cheap - www.ebay.comLive Search cashback
   Buy Wii cheap. You may get 35% off with PayPal if eligible.” under Sponsored sites
4. Click on the link, and it should take you to Ebay.
5. At ebay, you can search for whatever you want and get 35% cash back as long as it’s Buy It Now and pay it with Paypal.
6. You will get a letter confirm your cash back item. Example from a PS 3 confirmation letter.

To max out this offer, your purchase must exceed $714 (where 35% = $250). And you can get up to 3 cashbacks per ebay account. But of course you can spend less and still get the discount.

$700 - 35% ($245) = $455
$350 - 35% ($122) = $227

Sample ~$700 items that cost ~$455 after discount:
Mac Mini computer, Nikon D80 body, HD Camcorder

Or a Canon Powershot S5is minus 35% for $255. iPod Touch 16gb minus 35% for $176. Even an inflated $300 Wii will only cost $195. You get the idea.

This is a great way to get a huge discount on items that normally don't go on sale. And if you were planning on a big ticket item anyway, perhaps ebay is the way to go. And the BEST part? Microsoft is paying for it! Happy shopping!

Update: Matt says it works! And for peace-of-mind, below are some screenshots that show the cashback credit before you commit to buy. Cool!!

7/10 Update: This deal has been fluctuating between 10% and 25% the last two weeks. Will it ever hit 35% again? Who knows. Just keep checking everyday.



Link: Other Live Store cashback discounts

Making progress with the Captain

So we have the battle of the designers again. We all have to submit a design for the cover of our annual report (we call it "Progress Report" because it's always late). Anyhoo, below was my first design which was picked as winner by both the Sarge and Major. It was a photo composite that had movement, nature, color, and best of all, it made you forget you're in this graffiti-ridden paradise we call San Jose. I'm commended for my good work and off it goes to get the Captain's blessing.

The Captain didn't like it. In fact, she didn't like any of the others either. Not even close! She reduced them all to ashes with a single heated breath. Being blessed with uninformed wisdom, she offers some ideas and guidance to each of us for the next round of designs.

To me she said, "You! Lowly Servant #4, I order you to create a geometric collage of a specific transit center that features a variety of transit modes!" OK. To be honest, I thought it was a good idea. So I went exactly where she ordered me and took some photos and tried to incorporate precisely what she wanted. I came up with the cover below, to which both my rulers were even more pleased with. Score!


So off it goes to the Captain again. She didn't like it. Again. She didn't like any of the others either. Again. Being anointed with unharnessed power, she changed her mind and started running off with more different ideas. She barks to me, "You! Lowly Servant #4, listen carefully. I want a design that encompasses all these ideas: meeting the needs of the future, the evolution of transportation, the different fuels and different vehicles, digital readouts and technology, operations control room, transit grids and traffic patterns, and innovation and planning images. And the tagline shall be, Transportation solutions in the 21st century."

To make matters worst, the Captain took the other designers out back and executed them, thus elevating my ranking to Lowly Servant #1. Clearly this choice was made because I'm the nicest and least likely to offer resistance (yes, this is my curse). So now I get the honor of working with the executioner one-on-one. She hovers behind me as I type and my neck starts to twitch uncontrollably. I painfully follow her every morsel of non-sensible advice and try to make it work. Below was my creation. She absolutely loves it! I am now Dungeon Master!! Woohoo!!


She happily speeds off on her warcraft to visit the Godfather. Shortly after she enters his unholy realm, our walls shake as thunderous sounds rattle my shackles. We then hear a groan as it can only come from the depths of Hades. He hates it!! Oh noooooooo!!!!

He hates the photo. He hates the tagline. He think it looks too slick. "How dare we misrepresent our prison culture!" Heads are gonna roll....

Upon her return, I am stripped of my title and demoted back to Lowly Servant. I am commanded to work into the night on a 4th, 5th and 6th cover design because the Godfather wants choices. I crank out several covers not worthy of posting and that's when Insano realizes that I've suffered enough. My body and soul has endured irreparable damage and I could no longer perform at optimum levels. In her eyes, I've become a once-winning thoroughbred horse with a broken ankle.

She drags me out back for execution only to be saved by the Major. The Major reaches into her voodoo bag for a magical potion that restores life to one of the dead designers. "Let them work together and maybe they'll come up with something to your pleasing," the Major suggested.

The Captain agreed and I was spared. Besides, her python was still digesting one of the other designers.

Working with another designer is no fun. You would think we would speed along like a team on a tandem bicycle or canoe, but instead we moved like a three-legged race – awkward, uncoordinated and self-defeating. Clearly too many cooks in the kitchen and an entire new level of torture... I was about to end my life, but a fortunate series of events happened and the job was magically finished.

Stay tuned: Next week I'll show you the final winning design.

Related Link: Meet Captain Insano

Kidvantage – Have you heard of it?

Do your kids (boys) have a knack for always tearing a hole in their clothes? Or do your kids go through shoes more often than getting haircuts? Forget the misery and expense of buying new ones, just go to Sears and get a free exchange! Yes Free!

Sign up for the Kidvantage program at Sears. We've been taking advantage of this program for over 3 years now and I'm surprised so many of you have not heard of it. In the last 3 years, Chrissy and I have exchanged countless items (mainly shoes and pants) over and over again for new ones.

I don't know about your kids, but my boys tear up shoes and jeans quite steadily. What is it about boys that like playing on their knees or sliding on the floor...? I compare their shoes to mine. On my shoes, only the soles are worn. On their shoes, the tops of it are worn... What gives? In witnessing how they play – crawling and rolling all over the ground – it's no wonder how quickly they tear through clothes. I'm guessing girls are a lot more gentle on their garments.


So during my trip to Sears Saturday, I turned in the above pair of filthy, stinky, disgusting worn Reeboks. Before going to the register, I grabbed a comparable (albeit slightly more expensive) pair of replacement shoes that were the same size. I told the cashier it was under Kidvantage. She compared the sizes and said no problem. She scanned the new shoes and then typed on the register. Got a manager approval and that was it. She didn't ask for receipt, phone number, ID, credit card... nothing! Five minutes later I was walking away with a brand new pair of Reeboks. It almost feels like stealing. But it's totally legit!


Note: Every cashier is different. To save time, go to the older "seasoned" cashiers for the Kidvantage exchange. The younger, inexperienced, high-schooler cashiers don't know squat. One time some young chick asked me for a receipt and I had to do the Obi-Wan Jedi mind trick on her, "You don't need to see the receipt."

I know some of my readers have confessed to shopping in the kids sections (for themselves) to save money. Consider this: if you wear a kids size and maintain that same size, with Kidvantage you'll be set for replacement clothing for life!

For us, having two boys makes the program work even better. Since you can only exchange for the same size, whatever clothes Dustin outgrows, we can just pass along to Colby. I know of one family with 3 boys that can totally make a killing with this program!

Nowadays when I see my boys rolling around the dirt and grass, I'm almost encouraging them to just tear a hole in it. Because exchanging them for a new pair is a lot easier than getting the grass stains out!

From the Sears website:

Our KidVantage® Wearout Warranty is simple:

• it covers all children's apparel and footwear as long as the child for whom you bought the item continues to wear the size
• if the item wears out, Sears will, at its option, either repair or replace it with the identical item in the same size, or if it's unavailable, a similar item of equal value in the same size
• it covers children's sizes from infants' up to 18 in apparel, and up to senior kids' size 6 in footwear, with proof of purchase

Also, once you spend $100 (accumulated), you'll get a 15% coupon.

My trip to Sears

On Sunday, several of you asked if I was wearing my new Dockers. Unfortunately, I was not. Saturday was a busy day, I had to work, then shop, then rush home to go to a birthday party. Not to mention it takes a real long time to unpackage and iron those shirts and yank the tags out of the pants. So maybe next week.

Yes I had to work a photo-shoot on Saturday. They asked me last minute. And being the ever-accommodating, selfless, model employee that I am, I said, "Overtime, right?"

You see when I work on weekends, not only do I get reimbursed for mileage, but I also get paid for travel time. So those two hours I spend on the road traveling 100+ miles, I get paid overtime and 50 cents per mile – not too shabby. So of course I work. And better yet, Kmart and Sears are both along the way!

Our company is shooting a commercial, so it was a rare opportunity to get some "photogenic" passengers for once. It sure was hard work being out in the sun snapping pics all day... :)

As planned, I first went to Kmart to get my two $50 gift cards. Their customer service is absolutely horrible. They are poorly staffed, and the store just looks like a dump. The only register that would sell giftcards was held up on a price check for an item where the clerk was sent to the wrong department. I waited 15 minutes for a 2 minute transaction. I get my 2 coupons for Hulk tix and made my escape. FYI: Each coupon is good for 2 admissions at $7 each. Expires July 14.

Then to Sears I went. To be certain, I had a clerk swap my Kmart giftcards for Sears giftcards. It wasn't necessary but I just wanted to be sure – and besides, the clerk looked bored so I had to give him something to look busy. Then off to the mens department I went.

To my surprise, most Dockers were half off! To my second surprise, even with discount, pants were still $25-$35, shorts were $20, and shirts were $10-$18. A couple of you women thought it was expensive, "$20 for shorts!!!" but two of you guys said, "I pay more for my pants."

My medium shirt size was slim pickings, but still I was easily able to rack up $100 with the help of two pairs of pants. I was thinking, "Man, if I gained like 50 lbs, I can totally clean up on the clearance rack!" I mean at every store whenever they have clearance sales, usually only the XL sizes are left and all the mediums are gone. But then again, even if your wardrobe cost goes down, your food bill will go up. Obviously you can't win! Maybe that's why I notice gay people tend to date people of the same size. Because in doing so, they automatically double their wardrobe!

Upon checkout, I asked for gift receipts for all the items. Since I have to mail in the original receipt for the gas card, I want to be able to return if necessary. Come to think of it, with the gift receipt I can easily return any/all of the items and just get store credit to buy something I really want, like tools. Hmm, I guess I won't be unwrapping the clothes just yet.

Spend $100, get back $75 gas card, $10 giftcard and 4 movie tix, and maybe win a Prius!

Click on image for rebate form

All you fathers make sure your wives read this.

Starting tomorrow, June 7, through June 15, Sears is having a Father's Day promotion. If you spend $100 on Dockers (shoes excluded), you'll get back $75 on a Shell gas card, plus and additional $10 Sears Gift Card. And up to 2 redemptions per family!

Furthermore, Kmart is having a promotion where you get 2 movie tickets to see the Incredible Hulk if you buy a $50 giftcard. So buy $100 and get 4 tickets.

"And why does this matter?" you might ask... Did you know that Sears owns Kmart? And that you can use Kmart giftcards at Sears? Ding, Ding, Ding!!

So happy shopping and hopefully the next time you see me I'll be sportin' some new threads!


Press Release:

HOFFMAN ESTATES, Ill., June 2 /PRNewswire/ -- Sears announced today an
in- store promotion that will help dads and their families have "a gas"
this Father's Day. On June 7th, Sears will kick off the Men's Dockers
Father's Day event, where customers will receive a $75 gas gift card when
they spend $100 on any Men's Dockers merchandise (excluding shoes). Not
only will dad get free gasoline, but one lucky customer will also have the
chance to win a Toyota Prius with a retail price of $21,100! The event goes
through June 15th.

"We wanted to honor Dads this year with something that they may really
need and having an in-store promotion, such as the Men's Dockers Father's
Day event allows customers to get great gifts with an added bonus," said
Spokesperson Tim Danser.

How To Enter:

"Win a Toyota Prius From Dockers at Sears Department Stores" entry
forms can be found at Sears Department store point-of-sale posters between
June 7th and June 15th, and can be found online at
http://www.206inc.com/dockersgascard2008. The entry form serves as a gas card
premium item offer redemption form, but sweepstakes participants may enter
the sweepstakes without taking advantage of the premium item offer.
Additionally, when customers send in their receipt along with their entry
form, Sears will give them a $75 gas gift card and also a $10 Sears Reward
card by mail -- so a total of $85.00 back!

To enter, fill out the entry form in its entirety -- check the "opt-in"
entry form box to indicate your desire to enter the sweepstakes -- and mail
it to Dockers Gas Card Offer & Hybrid Car Sweepstakes, PO Box 1083, Grand
Rapids, MN 55745-1083. Entries must be postmarked by no later than July 1,
2008 and received by July 8, 2008.

On or about August 1, 2008, one lucky grand prize winner will be chosen
to receive a 2008 Model Year Toyota Prius, standard equipped, with a
manufacturer's suggested retail price of $21,100. The potential prize
winner will be notified by mail on or about August 15, 2008.

For Official Rules, prize descriptions and odds disclosure, visit
http://www.206inc.com/dockersgascard2008.