3 Things

Chelsea Clinton recently discussed current events with a U.S. soldier. She asked if, as an American fighting man, anything scared him.

He told her there were only three things he feared:

1) Osama

2) Obama, and...

3) Yo Mama

I need to take my job more seriously

Some days I just can't seem to take my job seriously. Take this whole month for instance. Our agency wants to jump on the global warming bandwagon (as we continue to operate our fleet of 500 diesel buses). We want to be more green because it's hip and responsible, plus Al Gore's a popular guy in Silicon Valley. So anyhoo, we're having this contest to come up with a logo and slogan to slap on our buses and trains to tell people we're "Going Green." We've had like 50 employees and their spouses submitting all kinds of ideas so obviously some people are really taking this to heart. Furthermore we just hired a new junior designer and she's real gung ho about it too. So between her and the others, I'm hoping that there's something good to pick from.

But just because we're being flooded with ideas, I'm not off the hook. As a resident designer, I'm still expected to submit something. And of course, expectations are much higher for someone of my design caliber ;) Problem is that I just can't seem to focus on the task at hand. Maybe I'm just insensitive (no way!) or maybe I just think the whole campaign lacks sincerity and reeks of hypocrisy. Well whatever the reasons, I find myself spinning my wheels and going nowhere. My designs often start out this way. It seems like I need to exorcise about 20 jokes before I can even start to get productive. So as I proceed through this creative process, let me share with you some slogans that almost made it to the GM:

1. We mean it when we Green it
2. The gas is Greener on our side
3. We've got the ride, if you've got the Green
4. Hey kids, it's Green... like weed!
5. Like real gas but it Snot!
6. We're Treehuggers, but our buses aren't
7. We cut routes, not trees
8. Less buses, less smoke
   
9. My other car is a Kinkisharyo (our light rail manufacturer)
10. Thanks to your green, we can be green
    

Yeah pathetic, I know. So if anyone else has any better ideas, I'm all ears.

LAPD's Official MP3 Player - Update

The linked page has been updated since my original post. It's a German company that probably is unaware of our American lingo and connotations. I'm sure they got some outrage which caused them to change the product's name. But fortunately for you, I took a screen shot of the original page in case you missed it the first time. Click on the image for a larger view.

Click here to see the revised link.

40

Yep. I woke up this morning and it definitely felt like 40. No lie. I felt much better yesterday morning. Thanks to my well-wishers for reminding me that my downhill spiral starts today.

My mind is already going because I can't think of anything to blog about. I have to resort to telling a joke. Sorry.

Sleeping Beauty, Tom Thumb, and Quasimodo were all talking one day.
Sleeping Beauty said, "I believe myself to be the most beautiful girl in the world."
Tom Thumb said, "I must be the smallest person in the world."
Quasimodo said, "I absolutely have to be the most tacky, rude, crude, gross disgusting person in the world."
So they all decided to go to the Guinness Book of World Records to have their claims verified.
Sleeping Beauty went in first and came out looking deliriously happy. "It's official; I AM the most beautiful girl in the world."
Tom Thumb went next and emerged triumphant,"I am now officially the smallest person in the world."
Sometime later, Quasimodo comes out looking utterly confused and says, "Who the heck is Rosie O'Donnell?"