Social justice, ghetto style

WARNING: Lots of violence and obscenities. Turn down volume because action speaks louder than words.

This video was uploaded yesterday from the 10 a.m. Muni bus in SF Chinatown.

As someone who grew up in Oakland, I've been intimidated on the bus countless times. So to see someone fight back, I feel a sense of justice finally being served (30 years later). Like, finally... someone standing up to thug. I know this is a very rare occasion, and violence is never the answer, especially when the Bible tells us that vengeance belongs to the Lord and that we should turn the other cheek... But I do feel the need to defend ourselves and not be a doormat to the scum of the earth. So please forgive me for taking a little bit of pleasure in seeing the old Chinese lady open a can of whoop-a** on the unsuspecting aggressor – Like did I see a flying kick in there??

Now had this been in Oakland on AC Transit, and the roles were reversed, you know someone is gonna get killed. True that!

On the serious side, obviously an assault occurred. But Muni is more concerned in investigating why the driver didn't report the incident than the crime itself. Unbelievable! Oh yeah, and I hear a "significant number" of cameras on Muni buses don't work. Beware.

LINK: Matier and Ross

DIY Laminate Flooring

There was a weekend last month where I had a free Saturday. I was already headed out early to Chinatown that morning and I needed to kill some time while waiting for my mom's dental appointment. I decided to visit Sincere Hardware and before I knew it, I was jamming 11 boxes of laminate flooring into my compact car.

Prior to this visit, I had been doing some research on laminate flooring: checking out color selections, materials, prices, and watching a lot of YouTube installation videos. I was convinced that this was something I could do on my own. I already had most of the equipment, I just needed a pullbar and a pushcut saw for the door jams.

The cheapest laminate flooring was 7mm thick @ 99¢/sq. ft. This is the standard 12"x48" that is most common. It has a printed pattern and plank marks. One look and you know it is laminate. I never liked this look because as time goes, the supposed invisible crevices where the planks meet will gather dirt and will become very visible. If you ever go to Ikea, look at their sample floor that people walk on. It's filthy.

I decided to get the 5"x48" individual planks @ $1.59/sf. I liked how they meet together like real hardwood planks. The grooves are real grooves so they look a lot more like real wood. Plus they were a lot thicker at 12mm, which is more warp-resistant and has better sound dampening.

I could have gone with real wood for as little as $2.99/sf., but wood dents more easier. To test the resiliency on the store sample, try digging your fingernail into it. If it leaves a dent, then it's too soft. Most hardwood would resist denting to an extent. But if you go further and dig in your car keys, laminate holds up better. In my mind I already knew laminate was the way to go in terms of durability and cost, especially when you have a house full of kids.

After a whopping six hours to move all the crap out of the office, remove the carpet, remove the carpet tacks, remove closet doors, and pop off the base mouldings, I was spent. Man, I had no idea it would be that much work... and I had not even begun installation! I guess that's the price I pay for being spontaneous. And I can't stop now. I'm at the point of no return.

Once I started, it took over an hour to lay down just three rows of planks. Keep in mind that since I got 5" planks instead of 12", I more than doubled the workload – ughh. Later as my brother-in-law came over to help, we were able to do 10 rows/hour, woohoo! I did all the sawing while he hammered away. Too bad he was only there for one hour because once he left, the workflow slowed big time. Yes boys and girls, do not attempt this by yourself, or else you'll be in for a long, looooooong day.

As I reached the final row, things got a little tricky with the door jams and that's when I realized I should've started on the door side and moved toward the window. Doh! Oh well, live and learn. So after a little bit of improvisation and ingenuity, I completed the job. And I was even able to save one unopened box for return!

I love the new floors now. Much better than the white carpeting I constantly had to keep clean. The only bad thing is now my computer chair rolls too fast and keeps crashing into the desk. But all in all a wonderful improvement and a great learning experience. Would I want to do it again? Ahh, no.

Final Stats: 11'x16' room, 6 hours prep, 8 hours install, $398, and 4 bandaids.

Removing the carpet tack strips from the concrete was a big pain
(and the cause for at least one bandaid).
Removing the base moulding wasn't too easy either (another bandaid).
And to make life even harder, the carpet pad was glued down (a little foul language).

How the bare floor looks like. The drizzle marks are the glue holding the carpet padding.

At the end of the first day.

I had to finish in time for our Friday mahjong party.

Absolute sharks! What kind of people get that many good tiles so early in the hand?

I can live with a 27

Above is my newest piece of equipment, a HP 27" monitor. It is paired with my Apple 23" Cinema display. On the surface you may think it's a pretty sweet setup, but once you dig deeper, you'll understand why I'm not totally happy.

Here in the dungeon we have a five year upgrade plan for our computers. Each of us was given a $5000 allowance to upgrade our workstations. Yes, generous amount. But did you know that it was originally only $3500? They increased it only after I complained about how Major Mallrat spent $4700 on a screaming machine that she uses just for displaying her email! And then three months later another $2700 on a Macbook Pro so that she can display her email at the salon. Okay, I admit I may be exaggerating her shortcomings a wee bit. She also is quite capable of opening a PDF file on occasion and can click on a link to get to the web... In other words, she's a perfect candidate for a $400 peecee.

So I get 5000 of your tax dollars! Woohoo! What to buy? What to buy?!

I decided to settle on a Mac Tower 8-Core 2.26ghz for $3299 and a Dell 30" monitor for $1249. Total just under $5,000. The Major burnishes her saliva with her mystic medallion on the dotted line and the order is executed!

Enter Captain Insano.

Here is an updated photo of Captain Insano. She recently underwent a makeover in an attempt to make her look more human.

Captain Insano, being the micro manager of all micro managers, always feels the need to look at all expenses incurred in the underworld (although she conveniently ignores the salaries of herself and her axemen). She nitpicks about EVERYTHING! When I scrape my knees on the cobblestone floor or if the rusted shackles cut into my ankles, she'll feel the need to take inventory of the bandaids I use. That's how anal she is!

So she sees my monitor arriving at the docks and immediately inquires with the Major about it. Together they decide to ship it back and blindly pick the above $350 HP 27" (with horrible specs) instead. Then in a total reversal, the Mallrat has the gall to come to me and say, "I had a feeling she wouldn't go for it..." Huh?? It's already been budgeted for!! You spit-sealed the paperwork!! And it already got delivered!! Talk about being twofaced! Good thing for my self control or else I would've grabbed the closest dead rat in my cell and chucked it at both her brown noses!

Captain Insano reasoned that the 30" is too bright and would lessen the gloomy vibe in our dungeon. She also says it eats up too much energy and may strain the torturous effectiveness of the electric chair. As a good will gesture, she offers to move me to an even smaller cell so that I can sit closer to the monitor.

In an unexpected surprise, she then invites me to her private lair to show how she too has to deal with the current budget woes. There she demonstrates how she can get by just fine by using one candlelabra and the heat lamp in her python cage for lighting. She further confesses how she's unable to upgrade her crystal ball to the beachball sized one and how she hasn't sharpened the blade on the guillotine in months. "You ought to hear the wailing when it doesn't cut through on the first pass!" she jokes.

When her evil echoing laugh finally died, the Captain glares at me and cautiously reminds me that I should be happy with my situation. "Perhaps I have treated you unfairly," she prods. She then inquires if I've noticed the absence of Sargent Scrooge lately. I nervously nod my head as I try not to look at the puss oozing from her boil. She then reveals how she demoted and dispatched the Sarge because of her complaints. The Sarge is now in some far away unknown territory serving as the chief fleet mechanic. Unfortunately the wheels on their bus go Stomp and Stomp.


My heart began to pound as I pleaded her to spare me a similar fate. With a flash of mercy, she says to me, "You can live." And orders the axemen to drag me back to the dungeon.

Back in my cell I realize that I should just be happy with what I have, and to not dwell upon what I almost did get but got sent back before actually getting it by my evil selfish oppressors. I mean life is pretty good here. We just got a new shipment of rat traps, and my neighbor with the B.O. problem is only here three days a week... And yes, a 27" monitor is still very nice, especially running extended desktop alongside a 23". With all that screen space, I can be pretty darn productive having four applications open at once, not having to click through layers of windows to find them. And it's so much easier to ignore emails if you can just glance at the sender and then blow them off. And when my 8-core arrives, I'll be able to work even faster!

Yes, life can be good if you change your perspective on things. I will always have my tormentors. But if I accept them for what they are (pompous, inept, power-hungry) and do what they demand of me (clean up their mess, perform miracles, read their minds), then we all can live, work, and play in harmony in our beautiful realm of destruction. Because I know life can be a LOT worse. They could make me work on a peecee!!

Oops, gotta go! The lights are flickering, which means the crystal ball powering up...

Disclaimer: Some or all of the characters may or may not exist in real life and can just be a figment of the author's imagination and varying frame of mind. Some story lines may have been altered and/or embellished for added entertainment value.

Family Day Today 4-8. Kids eat free.

Family Day 2009

The CRA is working with First Lady Maria Shriver to recruit restaurants for a statewide Family Day promotion Sept. 23. Family Day is celebrated in an effort to encourage families to spend quality time dining together.

To participate, your restaurant will offer a special Family Day promotion from 4 to 8 p.m. Sept. 23, either:

• a free child’s meal with the purchase of an entrée (limit two per table) OR
• a free entrée for a child with the purchase of an adult entrée (limit two per table).

Two options are available to accommodate restaurants that don’t offer a children’s menu and still want to participate in this promotion.

Participating Family Day restaurants
(California only - I see El Pollo Loco and Pasta Pomodoro on there!)

LINK

If you can't make it out tonight, you can visit Boston Market until October 31 and get your free kids meal there.

LINK

Sink or Swim?

Last month we attended a few swim parties. It seems like water parks are becoming more and more popular nowadays. Even public parks have free water play areas now (and I thought we were in a drought). Below are some photos from our YFC swim social and Jarod's birthday party in San Ramon.

When I was growing up, I loved playing with water. But water fun was limited to water guns and balloons. If you had a rich friend, then you could use their pool. Otherwise the only other option is the public pool. The pool near my house was Dimond Park where rumors were that it also served as a public urinal. I believed it then and I still believe it now.

If you are Chinese and you grew up in Oakland, chances are you don't know how to swim. The few exceptions are: (1) had wealthy parents who could afford private lessons, and (2) overseas born and already used to swimming in filthy waters (FOB).

At Oakland High School, there were only two determining factors to taking swim class: you either had to be real fobby or real ghetto to be in there, nothing in between. Oh how I still remember how the brothas used to snap the towels at the unsuspecting fobbies as they ran to and from the showers. No way I was gonna subject myself to that abuse. And since swimming was not a requirement, none of my smart friends took swimming either.

To those of us that can't swim, isn't swimming just soooo overrated?? If you're over 5 feet tall, 90% of all fun at water parks do not require the ability to swim. So unless you're training for the olympics or a job at Sea World, why learn? I mean what are the chances you're gonna fall off a boat or a bridge? (Provided the fall didn't kill you already or the sharks haven't eaten you.) Fact is, if there is an accident and you're dropped in the ocean, you're gonna die. Caught in a riptide? You're gonna die. Swept away in a hurricane? You're gonna die. Sure if you can swim, you won't die immediately, but you'll die eventually. God's timing is inescapable.

I don't think I've missed out that much in life not knowing how to swim. Sure I don't dare surf, jetski, or drop the cannonball, but I've been quite content eliminating all extreme sports from my recreation list. And now that my life is well into its second half, I'll probably need the pool more for physical therapy than fun.

Also back in the 80's, suntanning by the pool was hip while sunscreen was nonexistent. So to all my Bain de Soleil cocoa-butter buddies, look out, because melanoma may soon be knocking at your door!

Now this doesn't mean I'm preventing my kids from swimming, not at all. I want them to be a part of whatever fun their friends are having and to never feel left out. It's not their fault their dad grew up next to a ghetto and was deprived his entire childhood. I've learned to live without certain luxuries that other people take for granted. I've made my sacrifices so they don't have to. Isn't that what being a parent is all about? To unselfishly make their lives better than your own? I expect them to not just learn how to swim, but to excel in it through their adolescence. Because who knows? If someday I actually do fall off a boat, I'll need them there to save me!

Is it true that if someone breaks the water first, the second person has a softer entry?

Cannonballs away!
Note: All swimmers above either came from the burbs or private schools.

Bok Duck and Baby Duck. Patrick also graduated from OHS. I think sink.

Another OHS graduate. I think sink.

I taught Cameron good, as I filled my water gun with ice cubes before shooting him.

Future olympians, whale trainers, or Cirque de Soleil performers.

All Tangs on deck! Jarod turns one.

Who got the cocoa butter?

Gilroy Gardens for under $10

Link: Gilroy Gardens

Gilroy Gardens is probably one of the more wholesome family-oriented places you can take your small children. No foul-mouthed greasy punks, ghetto bangers, or teenage moms like at Great America or Six Flags. Just proper families with polite and obedient children like yours and mine :)

And now is the best time to go since the weather is cooling down because Gilroy can get plenty hot. We go at least once a year. And we always like to go with other families. That way, someone else can watch and entertain your kids while you sneak off and eat garlic fries by yourself (you know who you are).

Below are some photos from our last trip there this summer.

Most of the rides had zero lines, you just walk on (over and over again).

No gangbangers, but Asian drivers everywhere!

The view from atop the ferris wheel. "Daddy, something hit me on top of the head..."

The future greasy teens and ghetto bangers.

If you're not making dust, you're collecting dust.

Yesterday I spent Labor Day laboring in the garage. I recently scored a new Delta table saw on Craigslist. Dude bought it as a gift for a buddy, but his buddy ended up dying. Yes, sad. So he sold it to me at a 43% savings! Yes, good! Still sealed in the box. And delivered too! Yes, even better!

Craigslist is a great place to buy tools (because quality tools are expensive). Most people treat their power tools like they treat their gym memberships. They use it regularly at first, but then it sits around abandoned for the next few years. I would like to say I'm different, but I'm not. I too let my tools sit for a while with no projects on the horizon. But I know that if I upgraded from my portable Dewalt to a contractor's saw, I would have more ambition to attempt bigger projects. Time will tell.

Buying on Craigslist helps eliminate that guilty and wasteful feeling of overspending. Because if you bought it at a steep discount, let it sit for a few years and resell it, you will lose very little money. In fact, you may even break even or make a profit depending on how well you deal. So the only thing truly lost during those wasteful years is floor space. This also applies to treadmills, weight sets, large toys and practically anything else that's durable and not technology-driven.

For the longest time I was debating on buying a used saw. The biggest problem with a used table saw from someone's garage is the transportation, not to mention the lifting. This particular saw with the fence is about 300 lbs. I was really tempted to just order it from Amazon. But being the patient determined shopper that I am, I knew something great would come up eventually. And remember, everything is negotiable. Lowball them first. If they won't budge, then ask for delivery. Depending on location, most sellers will gladly meet because they too, just want to complete the sale.

I bought the Delta T30 Fence for $170. I couldn't justify getting the Biesemeyer at double the price. The Delta fence is very solid and sturdy. I can't imagine needing anything more.

One bad thing about buying new out of the box is the assembly (another reason not to buy new at Ikea). Over 100 screws and nuts! Even the motor had to be attached. Four hours to assemble just the saw (no thanks to the horrible instruction manual with 2 photos reversed). One hour for the fence. Although now if I ever had to assemble another one, I can do it in half the time!

Oh and another 2.5 hours to figure out how to best fit in the router table. All in all, a full day's work. Now I need to build the outfeed table...

Friday Freebies: More Free Food

And for those of you who missed the free tacos last Tuesday, you're in luck:

Free Tacos Today at Jack in the Box

Hope's Red Egg Party

On Saturday we went to meet Hope for the first time at the New East Lake Restaurant in Milpitas. We were quite honored to be invited to this event. Even though we've seen photos and read all about Hope's arrival through their blog, it was still quite a thrill to finally meet her in person. Hope is now 17 months old.

To add to the festivities, I got to hang out with many of my all-time favorite people (blog readers). I tell you, nothing beats all-you-can-eat, with the people you love! But the one person I was really looking to see was missing – Baldwin. I haven't seen him in over 20 years I think. Oh well, maybe when they adopt their next child, we'll get to see him...

Our only other disappointment was see not seeing Owen in matching attire! This is weird, because Owen and Grace normally come dressed alike at parties. Am I right? Maybe this time he couldn't find the exact matching outfit. Or maybe he couldn't find his size. Or maybe he did have it but spilled hot & sour soup all over it and had to change... No problem Owen, I got you covered (hee hee). Remember, my blog is like Fantasyland. You have to carefully pick and choose what you think is believable here. Below is how I would've pictured you in your smashing outfit! Hope you like it!

Grace, Faith, and Hope... with Owen looking Dope!

Faith was so adorable carrying a basket with her little Mini-Me in it.

With Patty's popularity, she gets invited to everything. Even when people's guest list have already exceeded the fire code, they'll still add Patty! Their reasoning is 1. Patty's a great friend that will add tons of life to the party, and 2. chances are, she won't show up.

Matt's been looking for a young boy to mentor in auto racing. And Jaden is the perfect candidate! We all know that Jim will eventually bless Jaden with the nicest car. Matt will then coach Jaden through the curves at Laguna Seca. And after Jaden walks away from the wreckage, Matt can breathe a sigh of relief thinking, "Wow. Good thing I didn't pay for that car!"

Can you name any other restaurant that hands out take-out boxes and encourages the guest to take all the food home? If we ever get invited back here again, we'll be packing the big cooler.

Oh I can easily think of a demeaning caption for this, but that would go against my nature.
Anyone else have a caption for this?